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 Jurassic
Park III
(for what it is)
Same
old song and dance…But, that's a good thing! If you're a
Jurassic Park enthusiast, like myself. JP3 has managed to still
keep you in awe. The dinosaurs move about with the same fantastic,
magical realism that hooked us in JP1 and even JP2/LW. Sure,
the story is wafer thin; it's part three for criminey sakes. But
where else you gonna watch a Tyrannosaur rex battle a Somethingamabobersaur?
They've
brought back Sam Neill (who'll always be the sexy Damien Thorn
to me) as the ever apprehensive Doctor Grant. He's so believable
as the dino expert it reminds you how annoying Mr. Aways Myself,
Jeff Goldblum actually was in JPdos/LW …Yech.
And
don't worry gals; they replaced cutely Vince Vaughn's character
Nicky (JP2/LW) with an equally attractive new-on-the-scene-wrap-him-up-
in-Dockers-and-flannel-I'll-take-him mansteak Alessandro Nivola
playing paleontologist, Billy.
Tea'
Leoni-maroni is our feline entry for the show. She's here being
chased, chomped on, and threatened with all kinds of carnivorous
behavior, by all kinds of extinct creatures. She's kind of mix-matched
with her on screen husband played by über talent Indy Film
star William H. Macy! Yep,
that W.H. Good for him. He's busted out of Fargo and traded his
parka and snow drifts for Bermuda shorts and Costa Rican coastlines.
He was his usual perfectly unacting styled actor self. A nerd
lost in a park lost in time
The
story goes…Seems there's a second island where the madman
behind the last couple of DNA-testing-gone-bad infusions, JP1/JP2,
John Alfred Hammond (John Attenborough) secretly (-even more secretly
than the last secret island-) bred captive (an oxymoron if ever…)
dinosaurs.
But on Fantasy Island 2 there is no luxury hotel and welcoming
Pina Colada clad Polenisians. NO! There are about seventeen species
of Dinos and a whole gaggle of Pterodactyls. They run the place
and don't take kindly to human folk intruding on their turf. That
and humans go so well with fern greens braised in a delicate swamp
water puree'.
The
Kirby's (Tea' and W.H) have hoodwinked Dr. Grant (Sammy) and his
associate Billy (Alessandro) to this land of the lost, the "other"
island (suspiciously Kaua'i looking-again), by bribing him with
a huge check for his nearly bankrupt research. Their motive is
pure though it's not dino eggs or Brontosaur's skins for elegant/illegal
shoes and Gucci bags. The Kirby's son has accidentally been stranded
on the jurassic infested island and they want him back…though
it's been eight weeks since anyone's heard from the lad….
Can you say Rapture din-din?
 But,
this is a movie and of course the kid's alive. See, he's read
all the dinosaur books by Dr. Grant as well as the ones by Dr.
Malcolm-that's convenient huh? They find him, and try to
just avoid becoming a midnight snack for a T-rex while heading
towards the coast for a presumed rescue squad to be awaiting them.
That's
it. But, it's not the story we're here to see is it? It's people
being attacked by dinosaurs that are so well animated I omagine
this his how these glorious creatures actually were! Hey it's
as close to their world as we could ever hope to get--at this
point. And for all the adult seven year olds in the packed audience,
that was more than worth the price of admission. It's rehashed
been-there-done-that stuff but it's still wicked cool!
You
know you're going if you remotely enjoyed the original, or even
the Lost World. True there's no Pete Postelwaite, or Vinnie, or
even Julianne Moore but Laura Dern steps in and Sam's back with
a pretty good mix of new blood…
Snack Recommendation: Nestle Crunch bars and Rapture Egg
Omlettes
Starring: Sam Neill, W.H. Macy, Tea' Leoni,
Allesandro Nivola and Trevor Morgan
Directed By:
Joe Johnston
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