|
 Phone
Booth
 
Starring: Colin Farrell, Forest Whitaker, Radha Mitchell,
Katie Holmes and Keifer Sutherland.
Directed by: Joel Schumacher
Rated:R
Colin Farrell Interview
Phone
Booth is an odd little film…it's about an hour and ten
minutes long and a tad bipolar. On one hand you have an incredible
performance by the "it" man of film, Colin Farrell.
Farrell manages to show how he can captivate completely and single
handily keeps the film completely watchable - even addictively
enjoyable - though we basically stare at a phone booth the entire
time. Then
there's a wasted mega talented Forest Whitaker strolling through
Cop 101 helping to deliver this frustrating story ….I say
frustrating because it should have been brilliant. That's why
I'm being a b**ch and handing in the low star rating - I hate
star ratings anyway so why not play with it?
Story
goes Stu Shepard (Colin Farrell) is a fast talking smooth negotiating
publicist in New York City. He wheels and deals publicity for
his clients like an Indie 500 racer. His assistant, or intern,
watches trying to absorb the art form. In a matter of a ten minute
walk through Times Square Stu has booked a cover of a magazine
for one client, tricked a tabloid into printing an article about
his other client, managed to book a trendy eatery on a big event
night - and have that restaurant supply the 80 meals on their
dime - for yet another …. he's good - real good - at what
he does.
He sends his assistant off to deliver a bottle of whiskey and
a soup recipe to an editor and so the kid can meet the players.
This is also a clever ploy to 86 the assistant so Stu can do the
horizontal mambo with his mistress. Well call her to set up the
"dance."
Here's
where the film really starts.
Stu
gets into a phone booth (so his wife can not trace his calls)
and rings Bedsheet Barbie, aka Pam (Katie Holmes). A sexual soiree
is penned into his planner and as he departs the booth thankin'
the Blarney for his good fortune, the phone rings and he answers
it.
This
is not Pam calling back to reconfirm the hotel room number - no
- it's a nut job that's decided it is time for Stu to repent for
his atrocious sins of deceit and people using. Lesson? Never answer
the ringing pay phone - it's never going to be good.
Stu
immediately figures it's got to be some hack actor he wouldn't
help and gives him a piece of his mind. Not a real good idea.
Meanwhile just outside the booth, a group of hookers who normally
use this particular phone booth for their business conferences
need the booth -NOW! At this point Stu is politely told if he
hangs up he will be shot from a window above…
Oopsie,
this caller is no actor - seems he's a morality judge and jury
that has a hair across his ass for liars and a automatic rifle
in his hands to punctuate his point.
That's
it, that's the story. A man is picked out of millions, accused
of crimes against humanity, and a sniper psycho puppets a man's
future.
Okay
great premise right? Now the bad news…. even the central
character Stu asks the sniper, "Why me? Why not a child molester
or murderer." The screenwriter Larry Cohen, either wanted
to infuriate the alert or didn't see the great opportunity of
a twist he had here dangling before him. Make the guy guilty of
some secret hideous crime. Give us the "Frailty
Slap!" But no. He makes Stu a hard working publicist.
Their jobs, in case your unaware, is to get their client press.
They are skilled manipulators certainly less cruel than say, an
agent or lawyer or ….I was a tad thrown with the vigilante
choosing him. In the first ten minutes of the film we saw a smooth
business man just doing his job - and doing it well. He also gave
hos assistant money for a suit to better the assistant's career
and managed to assist four clients in their dreams. Sure the guy
cheats but that's no reason to kill the man....argh. Vigilante
boy picked the wrong guy….
Then
there were all those dumb moves the police made once they were
on the scene. I mean if you watch "Law and Order" (the
Vincent D' Onofrio one) you'd know immediately the dude in the
booth is on the phone with "someone" he can not hang
up on. That and the fact that two other folks in the two weeks
before we shot by an unknown sniper within a three block radius.
Double argh!
 But
let's focus on the plus side, like say, this adorable crumpet
of studmuffin Mr. Colin Farrell. Who wouldn't want to dip him
in Magic Shell© brand butterscotch
topping and slowly nibble if off whilst Irish love songs for the
panflute tinkle on the victrola? Sure he's got a notorious potty
mouth - using the word F*** like an adverb - and sleeps around
like a Tomcat in Crete - but just look at him…..purr. It's
a well-known scientific that fact bad boys equal good sex. And
as an added mansteak bonus? He's super talented. This film truly
lets him prove to Farrell disbelievers he's worthy of all the
hubaloo.
Forest Whitaker is just wasted. Any one could have played this
"cop."
Phone
Booth has its moments and Colin shines throughout, but it's
just too weird with television-like narration and bad structure
that make it more like a excellent "Twilight Zone" episode
rather than a Joel Schumacher film. Wait for video kiddies!
Snack
recommendation: Pizza and another movie
BLUNTLY
SPEAKING:
|
