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Final Destination

NOTHING is creepier than movies that revolve around airplane crashes. Well, except perhaps, Rosie O'Donnell in that feature where she wore black dominatrix wear...what was that? I am still in therapy. After that visually vomiting flick the next tale of terror is the plane crash-so real. Those scams Freddie and Scream trilogy? Never happen. Can watch them fear-free, even giggle. Air crashes, are another story...

Final Destination is about a small group of students who are heading to Paris for a school trip. One, Alex (Devon "very tiny Tim Robbins-esque" Sawa) has a "nightmare" on board right before takeoff and freaks. Completely blows a cerebral gasket. He's off this hunk-o-tin and now! A couple of students for one reason or another (mostly so there is more than one person in the storyline) follow.

A pubescent fist fight breaks out in the gate area between "psychic boy" Alex and Carter AKA "tough jock? rat? boy" (Kerr Smith) in the background through the large pane window the plane indeed explodes everyone else dies. Eeek. Chills-are-us.

Death 260, students 0. Wait. What's this? Seven made it off the craft. Death don't like when he feels cheated. This is no 'Meet Joe Black' death either. Get the image of Brad Pitt all sexy and soft spoken in black Armani out of the retina cavity right now. This Mr. Death lurks unseen and enjoys intricate Acme-like gizmos set up to do away with those who think they got away.

The first spared student to go is the wickedly annoying voiced Tod (Chad E Donella). Thank God. Sorry, but his voice was like seven inch nails repeatedly scraped against a chalkboard with an undertone of cat-in-heat. I really couldn't have taken one more minute. He's killed real good.

Next up? Hmm. Is there a pattern emerging? Yep.

I liked it. Even though it moved molasses slow and the dialog was, well, horror movie dialog. The killings are well thought out and original. In this day and age-that's something. I am still smarting over a cameo by the mortician (Tony "high commander of creepville" Todd AKA The Candyman) scene. Was he death come a visiting in the flesh? If he wasn't why wasn't he wearing a smock whilst de-blooding the corpse of aforementioned rat voiced Tod? My vote is he was death toying with his next incumbents into "White Light High". You decide.

Snack Recommendation: Croissants with Cafe Latte

Starring: Devon Sawa, Ali Larter Chad E. Donella , and Kerr Smith

Directed by: James Wong IV Rated

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