Starring: Reese Witherspoon, Josh Lucas, Patrick Dempsey,
and Candice Bergen
Directed by: Andy Tennant
lord, is this Wonder© brand white
bread and generic yellow mustard! Plain old typical. I fear
the screenwriter never visited Alabama. The script is riddled
with Southern stereotypes not seen since the early forties.
The whole thing's like a bad attempt at "The Grapes of
Wrath" meets "Friends."
I the only one in the theater that noticed Reese Witherspoon's
character, Alabamian transplant Melanie, falls in and out of
her Alabamian accent? It was so annoying. Hello, Reese? Yeah,
you get like twenty million a flick now. Could you hire a coach
and learn to drawl like an Alabamian, or at least a long transplanted
Georgian? I mean the film is called Sweet Home Alabama!
goes Meg Ryan, er, I mean Melanie Carmichael (Reese - peanut
butter on a- Witherspoon) lives in the big city, New York. She's
a perky, likeable rapidly growing fashion designer whose life
is on the right track. She comes complete with gorgeous hair
and a handsome, successful, beau of perfection on her arm.
beau, Andrew (Patrick Dempsey), is simply mad for her. Filled
with the heroin of love, he decides to pop the question in an
material girl's wet dream way. He gets Tiffany's Fine Jewelry
of Manhattan to close for an evening. He's an upcoming politician
and his mother's the mayor, so it's believable
reopens just for them as the surprised Melanie is met on one
knee by Andrew and offered the pick of the engagement ring litter-
the 24 carrot Tiffany's litter that is! Natch, she agrees to
wed the young romantic.
but there's a catch. Mel's got a big old catfish of a secret
back in them thar woods of Alabama. Seems as a youngun, she
done got her self hitched to a swell looking high school sweetheart
and then did nuthin' to undos it!
she must saunter back to Alabama and detach from an old spouse.
This is where they start to lose me and the I-aint-buying-everything-you-feed-my-big-brain-Hollywood-movie-people!
part of the audience. See, she has been gone from Alabama for
over seven years. But when we meet her estranged husband he's
still pining away for her and has just plum avoided the signing
of the fancy fangled documents. PLEASE.
the humor - and I use that term in its lowest elementary term
dear listeners - begins. Little Miss City comes home to the
backwards haunts of her yesteryears. But, of course, all her
friends and kin are embarrassingly simple and still too plain
for her. She tries so hard to just bare with it while her husband
Jake (Josh Lucas) tries to win her back
it's been seven years! He's alright looking, aside from
a couple of impediments; one that makes his mouth region look
like he's perpetually sucking a lemon, and the other is a continual
squint like the Griffs lights are too bright. But, Jake's a
classic-style L.L.Bean looker. So, what in the holy name of
Elvis would this guy be doing still smitten with this polar
opposite city gal? Exactly. It's a tad far fetched - it's a
romantic comedy - go with it I suppose. BUT, the characters
are so unrealistically mundane that one just prays she leaps
back on that aircraft and gets her designer buttocks back to
the big city. Cue theme music to Green Acres here, please. Ah,
but again, the "relationship" between her and Jake
is just one of the films eight billion subtle annoyances.
does Reese. She's cute but she's starting to be Reese on film.
She can do better, I've seen it! Rent Election or even the adorable
Legally Blonde. Here, her "character" pouts and whines
and degrades while trying to endear herself to us. Yech. She
looked pretty though.
Josh Lucas just misses being a studmuffin extravaganza. It's
the afore mentioned lemon sucking bit. What is that?
He looks like Matthew McConaughey and Woody Harrelson got themselves
genetically spliced together for a quick spawning. He's an all
right actor, though.
was nice to see Patrick Dempsey all suited up and twinkling.
He's a nice looking chap anyway, but throw the guy in an Armani
suit and let the purring begin. Meow pfst-pfst.
is pretty bad. If you're a Reese fan, have a Reese night and
rent a few titles at the local video barn. If not, opt for another
recommendation: Fried green tomatoes and frosty beer in
a glass mug.