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X-Men III: The Last Stand

May is McKellen Month Here at BluntReview.com!

Starring: Hugh Jackman, Halle Berry, Ian McKellan,Patrick Stewart, Kelsey Grammer, Anna Paquin and all the leedle mutants we love
Directed by: Bret Ratner
Hugh Jackman Interview

 

Bluntly speaking? I am of the firm belief that anything where Ian McKellen is involved is sure to be a winning venture. Face it, Sir Ian's in that rare realm of thespian folks you could watch read a Hungarian goulash ingredient list, alone upon a blank dank stage which is dressed in but one dim bulb, while mites (that are possibly plague-ridden)-bite mercilessly at your ankles, and you'd still be mesmerized, hanging on his every syllable.

Here, in X-Men 3: The Last Stand, Mac and his mutant cohorts do not disappoint. The elements of all the beloved characters are being sewn up nicely and the final chapter leaves you fairly full up on developments. Still, CGI wizardry and high-volume action scenes acknowledged, as a whole the film lacks…shall we say…pizzazz?

Story goes…Mutants and human relationships are still strained. There are a few mutants makin' a bad name for the others who just wanna get along.

Xavier's School for the Gifted, holds among the student body, a team of elite mutants that rush to the rescue of mere mortals and mutants alike when the likes of power mad anti-Homosapien Magneto come a callin' with the latest dohinky of doom. But this time it's the U.S. government that has hatched a new link in the evolution of cohabitation. They found a mutant that carries an anti-mutant gene in his blood. His rare strain makes even the wackiest of super powers dissipate when his "antibody" fluid is introduced. They have a cure for being a mutant…

Magneto (Ian McKellen) is not happy! A cure? They don't need no stinkin' cure!

Meanwhile, characters frolic about and the motley crew of do-gooders, Storm (Halle Berry), Logan (Hugh Jackman), Iceman (Shawn Ashmore), and so forth, have to save the world again. But, as this is the final in the trilogy, the writers are going to serve up some pretty unexpected alliances, and strange choices of character killing-offs abound! Still, snippets of unexpected daring aside, the story isn't even close to as satisfying as May's climatic LOST season finale; it's Lost Light with1/2 the body and 1/3 the soul. But I suppose, X-Men folks will relish in the twists and answers. I ate like a Tyrannosaurus Rex just to stay awake during the Wolf-free scenes…

There are a coupla mutant introductions added for your viewing pleasure. First is a blue-furry government liaison, Secretary of Mutant Affairs, named, Dr. Hank McCoy aka The Beast (Kelsey Grammer). Second is an oddly uninvolved character named Angel (Ben Foster) the man with the Arc Angel-like wingspan. Angie is beloved and essential in the comic, yet, unloved and adrift in the film, He's developed then dropped like a delicate sparrow's nest caught up in a tornado of rapid fire plot points.

This is X -Men kids, and one does not expect 'A Twelfth Night' deep yarn to play out before you. And story-wise X-Men 3 does not disappoint in the minimal brain-space required to follow the bouncing mutants.

X3: The Last Stand is almost stupid actually, and if Sir Ian and Hugh the Beautiful were not mixed in to the mayhem, and if Sideshow Bob's voice were not bellowing(- hilariously quipping one liners)- from a (dare I say it) manly version of Kelsey Grammar disguised as a smart aleck turquoise-tinged bloke with a shedding issue, one would re-rent X-Men 2 and admire the snarling brooding Wolverine chap slipped into form fitting leather frothing and foaming within a much better film…

Snack recommendation. Furr-free fudge flavored Bon Bons while ingesting audio cues from The Cure on full blast within your abode, and a muted Apt Pupil, for visual punctuation, on the widescreen.

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